Written by Linda Austin
Clarksville, TN – The New Year, the perfect starting point for a journey of transformation into the ideal “New You” that we all daydreamed of many times throughout last year.
The humorous irony is not lost on us, and yet we move forward, hopelessly optimistic and excited to pursue a laundry list of promises we make to ourselves that we quickly struggle to keep for more than a week.
Now, of course, it’s understandable that life gets very busy and distracting. Being the very clever creatures we are, we gladly use all the sparkly distractions as convenient excuses to justify putting the hard and tediously boring goals of self-improvement that require willpower on the back burner.
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Despite knowing we are consistently resolute in procrastination, let’s not be discouraged or too cynical of our past selves, because “This year is going to be different!”
This year we have a guide and a plan to prepare ourselves to dodge the usual metaphorical banana peels we tend to slip upon in the obstacle course that is life. This year we’ll embrace our New Year’s resolution with humility, and the determination of a ballroom-dancing sloth on three shots of espresso – methodically slow, and gracefully steady, with an occasional burst of energy.
So let’s waltz together into success, vibing to the rhythm of “Quick, quick, slow. Quick, quick slow.”
This year, let’s be S.M.A.R.T., it’s an acronym that stands for:
Specific – What is my goal? “To Conquer the WORLD!”
Measurable – Keep a journal to track activities and progress. Just as importantly, journal the times you
didn’t do what you promised yourself, so you can learn what thoughts or obstacles in daily life are
holding you back. “Today, I did a sit up. It was a profoundly proud moment in my plans for world domination. Unfortunately, the imposing force of Mount Laundry beckoned me from doing two sit ups.”
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Achievable – Be realistic, but also believe that the goal is achievable and give yourself grace along the
process. “I’ve come to realize that my plans to conquer the world might be slightly ambitious, given my time line of just one year, so I’ll start firstly with conquering myself. Then next year, I’ll be better prepared to conquer the world!!!”
Relevant – Remind yourself every day WHY you want to accomplish this goal. “I want to conquer the world because owing a shiny desk placard titled Supreme Overlord would be super cool.”
Timeline – Give yourself a deadline to create a sense of urgency, to do and complete the tasks daily.
“I want to lose 30 pounds by April because world domination requires me to be nimble on my feet.”
Other Helpful Advice:
Embrace the B.S. in life. Utilize the Buddy System with a friend who has a similar resolution and become accountability buddies. We’re less likely to cheat on ourselves if we must feel the sting of shame when having to confess our sins, and suffer low-key judgement.
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Don’t have any friends? No worries, neither do I. For some incomprehensible reason, the desire to
become Emperor of Earth is socially off-putting. That’s O.K., now we have another New Year’s resolution to get excited about; mental note, read the book, “How to Make Friends and Influence People”. Then start a movement of fanatical supporters.
Remember, the key to sticking to your New Year’s resolutions is persistence. If you fall off the wagon,
just dust yourself off and hop back on. And if all else fails, there’s always next year!
